Endurance

Tonight, I made my debut as a "motivational" speaker. I was the guest presenter at my local support group.

The Topic? Exercise. Exercise and the Bariatric Patient. A topic I know well. It was a small group tonight, but I think the presentation went well. Was hoping to get it done in about 30 minutes, ran to 45. Typical of me, run a little longer than I planned. Get it? :-)

Got some bad news today though. The Bariatric Coordinator at our hospital is retiring. Wondering what happens to the group next. We shall see.

Also got a reminder how difficult the post bariatric surgery transition can be. And how our lives can be turned upside down. A friend of mine (yes, Beth, I consider you a friend) announced to the world that she and her husband are divorcing.

http://www.meltingmama.net/wls/2011/06/baby-steps.html

Beth, I worry about you, I wish you comfort, I hope things in your life turn out for the best.

And she is not alone. I know of at least 2 others people in the bariatric community that are on the verge of the same thing. (They shall remain nameless at this time.) According to John Pilcher, MD, FACS, “Bariatric surgery patients find themselves having to deal with the sea change that happens in their life as they lose half of their weight, or half of themselves,” says Pilcher. “Their whole relationship with food changes, as do their relationships with spouses or partners, their
family, and their coworkers.”

In the first year after surgery, Pilcher says, patients often find themselves “trying to figure out who this new and different person is that they see in the mirror. Adjusting their self-image is not easy. They know they’re wearing different clothes, and the number on the scale is different but, if they close their eyes, patients tell us that they still picture themselves as fat.”

The divorce rate after weight-loss surgery is extremely high, according to Pilcher. So is the rate of job change.

That’s not always a bad thing. Morbidly obese people, subject to a lifetime of discrimination, often come to feel helpless and accept situations others would not, says Pilcher. “Many patients, through the weight loss, become empowered to get themselves out of situations—work or marriage—that were bad,” he says.

Not everyone is affected in the same way, however. “If a patient in a long-term marriage was a normal weight when the marriage began,” Pilcher says, “that marriage is probably in pretty good shape to withstand the changes following surgery. If the patient was heavy at the time the marriage or the relationship began, however, there’s an 80% to 85% chance that that relationship is going to break up within two years of surgery. (http://rfl.com/Portals/3/PDF/Counseling%20Bariatric%20Surgery%20Patients.pdf)

Makes me glad to think my relationship with Jina is strong. Do we fight? Yeah... who doesn't. But we make it through. Heck, who knows, one day she might even get the bling.